Simplify. This has been my word for a few years now. I desire a simple life, low stress, surrounded by only things I truly need. I think it began when I moved from a 1500 square foot house to a 900 square foot apartment. This took some serious downsizing and I realized I didn't really need all that stuff anyways. I began looking for other ways to decrease material things and increase my joy and satisfaction with my life as it is. It's a struggle in a world that says you need a large home, the latest gadgets, a closet full of fashionable clothes (and shoes), and fun toys to have a good life. I was dabbling in this process of simplifying when I found Pinterest.
I love the idea, I really do, and after a few days I began telling everybody I knew that they had to try this site. I began pinning anything and everything that seemed like a great idea. I decided there was no need to buy a scarf, when I could make one "so easily" on my own. There's no need to buy Christmas presents when I could "so easily" craft them. I pinned creative activities to do with my children, I pinned creative organizing tips, cleaning tips, and recipes for homemade EVERYTHING. I was gung ho, went shopping for the supplies I would need to do all these things and pulled out the sewing machine. Here's what I discovered: I hate spending the few minutes alone I have during the day sewing and it's impossible to sew with a toddler, at least in my house. Honestly, I don't really like sewing and I'm really not good at it. I tried my hand at jewelry making which the boys promptly invaded. The evening ended with my husband and I completely frustrated trying to figure out how to complete the necklaces and bracelets my kids were beading a mile a minute. There was yelling and tears, I'm not proud of it. I bought tiles and felt pads at Home Depot two years ago with the intention of making personalized coasters. They're still in the garage. I pinned a whole bunch of meaningful Advent ideas that I never quite got around to putting in place, birthday party ideas I'll never have the patience to actually do and craft ideas that now just have my head spinning. AHHHH!!!
So it's a new year. My desire, again, is to simplify my life. I've thought and prayed about where God wants me this year, what things should I commit to that utilize the talents and abilities He has given me. And you know what? It's not in being crafty. As much as I would like to be artistic and make all the gifts I give, that's just not my talent and I'm pretty sure God's not honored by me trying to be someone I'm not. It's also not in planning amazing parties or activities for my children. As much as they would love to have a mom who could party plan with the best, I think they would also love a mom who's not completely stressed because she's trying to pull of something she doesn't even like doing. What I do love and seem to have some talent at is cooking healthy meals for my family. And not over the top healthy, with foods we can't afford to buy. I'm going to do the best I can with the foods available to me and not feel guilty. I also love writing. I would so much rather use my free time writing than struggling with a sewing machine. I'm not sure what that will look like, but when I have the time, I will write. I discovered last year that I love praying. I learned to spend good, quality time listening to God and spending time with Him. And then I committed myself to too much other stuff and missed out on that time with Him. This year I will spend time praying. And there you have it. There's a lot of other things that pull for my attention that I don't really have much choice about, a 2 year old, for instance. I love my crazy life with three busy boys and an even busier husband. I must care for my children and husband, I must work and I must attempt to keep a clean home. But after that, I will cook, I will write, and I will pray.
