Carry Me

I don't know about you, but I think being a mom is absolutely exhausting.  For me, it feels as though there's all these people, most of them little, who rely on me for everything.  EVERYTHING.  A friend recently expressed that it's not only in having to DO everything for her littles, it's having to THINK for them, too.  It's hard enough to think for myself!  I wouldn't change my life or wish not to have my kids, but I'm gonna be real honest and admit there are times when I look longingly back at the time before we had kids or toward the future when they're out of the house.  I know I shouldn't do this, I know I should "enjoy them while they're home because the time is so short and you'll long for that time, later".  I know, I know, I hear it constantly from wise women who have grown children.  But, really, I just want to sleep!  I want to wake up when I wake up, not because I'm getting kicked in the face by cold little feet.  I want to go on a date with my husband without having to plan 2 weeks in advance, depend on other people to watch the kids, and have to get back before bedtime.  I want to have nice furniture that I don't have to worry about getting spilled on, peed on, or worse.

Okay, Okay, enough dreaming.  I really do know the importance of enjoying these crazy moments while my kids are home and most of the time I do.  I promise!  Just trying to keep it real and honest here.  The whole reason I'm writing about this is because I have another one of my prayers to share with you.  This one was written after reading Psalm 28.  Specifically, where David says "Hear my cry for mercy as I call to you for help, I lift up my hands toward your Most Holy Place." (vs. 2) and in verse 8-9 when he says "The Lord is the strength of his people, a fortress of salvation for his anointed one.  Save your people and bless your inheritance; be their shepherd and carry them forever."

Being a mom, I'm always the one the kids come to when they are hurt, scared, or just need a hug.  I'm the one always doing the comforting, kissing boo boo's, and rocking back to sleep. Not complaining.  I love this! But sometimes I need to be comforted.  That's where I was when I wrote this prayer:

I love the thought of You carrying me like a lamb.  Sometimes I feel like so much is expected of me and I have to be so strong for everyone else.  Sometimes I need to be carried, to be held in your arms and taken care of.  I need the peace of knowing I don't have to worry about anything, I only need to trust You and rest in your promise.  Thank you for allowing me to do that.  2/28/06

Just like my 3 year old comes to me with his arms outstretched, needing a little comfort from his mama, I can come to Jesus with my arms up and He'll carry me like his little lamb.  Somehow that makes the exhausting task of motherhood bearable.  After all, I'll have the rest of my life to sleep, right?